true love?

how would you know if true love is staring right in front of you? what if the perfect person for you is right beside you and you take them forgranted??

questions...

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we talked last night. finally. i was able to somehow say what i feel. in the little i said, lam ko he knew what i meant. he understood. kahit pa the reasons behind it were so petty.

i hurt him. and i'm hurting me as well. isip ko nga habang tumatagal i'm getting stupid. i mean, if what you are doing hurts you, then why are you doing it still. in the middle of the conversation, i sometimes felt the urge to laugh.. it was so stupid. the two of us, parked in the Don Bosco chapel, crying.. it was like.. HELLER???!!!

i've used the word "traumatic" to describe what i felt i've gone through. really, parang i can't go through the preps again.. getting your hopes up... and everything. it really breaks my heart.

you know, when he said punta kami heritage.. parang eto na nman.. tapos wala naman. parang nang aasar. maybe he was trying to cheer me up, to give me hope that all our plans will come to be.. pero you know, talga nman eh kahit pumunta kami dun yest, ocular na nman.. dagdag papers for my file. and thats it. paasa.

but you know, love ko sya. cguro medyo kampante me, kasi di naman talga sya mawawala.. minsan nga isip panu kung totoo na?? kayanin ko kaya.. (cyempre kaya) pero mahirap di ba. unlike sa mga before.

at tama ba naman na iniisip nya na bka si sonny pa din mahal ko. cguro ang gusto ko na lang pagdating kay sonny, makita sya or maka date man minsan or something like that and makita sya in my true eyes and, eto yun pinaka gusto ko.. ma reject sya.. bwahahaha!!! ang bad ko talga.

cguro di sya secure sa akin, kaya nya naisip un.

i'd marry him kung pwede lang eh. kaya lang hindi. that's the most i can do.